lecturY artZ & crAftz~

juZ about 1.5hrz agO.....me and mY mafiA were stucK in a droninG lectuRe witH a "higH" lectureR...and so we decided to do soMe arttY stuffZ durinG lectuRe! ;P

it begAn wheN hAng-ni-mah kindlY offeRed uz chewinG guM:


nice and greeN~!!! ;P


so, renatA hAz a hAbit of removinG the foiL froM the wrApper of eAch guM striP and theN pressinG and adherinG the metAllic foiL onto heR noteZ...into beAutiful shApez liKe a heArt:




i'Ve alwAyz beeN fAzcinated...and i tried to remoVe the whoLe piece of the foiL...and keeP it intAct....heRe, it'Z abouT 99% intAct:


mY 1sT foiL removAl attempT~!!!


afteR removinG the foiL....the wrApper becomeZ de-shiNed and becomeZ a plAin piece of whiTe pAper witH jAgged edgeZ...and hAng-ni-mah mAde a mini airplAne witH it...hahAa...me mAde an airplAne too! theN tizzY folded it intO a funnY shApe and dreW a smileY fAce on it:


L to R: tizzY'z smileY piece, mY plAne, hAng-ni-mah'Z plAne~


we didn'T reAlly flY the plAnez arouNd mucH... ;P

hmM...guezZed we entertAined ourselveZ witH ouR bubbLe guM - whiLe kindA knowinG whAt the lectureR wAz tAlking abouT on the evolutioN of the immuNe syzteM... hahAaa...


arttilY~
illZ~

~henessY versuZ remY mArtin~

remembeR i blogGed abouT mY heAvenly henessY v.s.o.P..?

okAi....over mY weekeNd groceryinG, me grAbbed a bottLe of remY mArtin v.s.o.P. juZ to exploRe more fiNe aperitif wineZ...

and....remY burnZ me moRe! felT "burnY" sooN afteR drinkinG and simplY felT hoT (bodY temperAture wiZe)......aH......mAkez me sweAt buT it feelZ awesoMe thougH...

awesoMe to drinK too.......and the besT iz the pAckaging incLuded 2 wiNe glAsses so i don'T hAve to buY anY! ;P

foR noW, henessY iz preferRed for a sloW, sweeT, soothinG, enjoyAble, and lAughy drinK befoRe enterinG dreAmland... ^O^


kudoZ to v.s.o.P....
illZ...

2nd mArylandy rAinbow~!!!!

cAught thiZ one whiLe in hAng-ni-mah'Z hondA!!


i wAz glAd i manAged to photO thiz rAinbow thAt suddenlY appeAred afteR a suddeN pouR of rAin! thAnkz to dR. kAng who noticed it! ;P

thinK i blogGed on rAinbowz before...and mY ideA iz to photO any rAinbow thAt i see in mY life - simplY bcuZ....the probAbility of seeinG any rAinbow iz juZ so loW, agRee? so we gottA treAsure everY sightinG!! ;)

anywAyz...thiZ morninG wAz weiRd - i suddenlY felT uncomfortAble durinG clAzz...felT liKe vomitinG and juZ wannA go hoMe and sleeP....actuAlly i drAgged myseLf out of bed to go clAzz...wAz lAte for about 15min...and theN i decided to persisT througH! luckilY i broughT my jAcket cuZ i felT chillY too! felT betteR witH tiMe and i struggLed througH the whoLe dAy! ^o^

wondeR whY...?

buT hopefullY it'Z not the swiNe fLu.....doubT so! mine'Z juZ due to the seAsonal chAnge bAh....i hAve beeN feelinG slightlY unwelL througH the pAst fortnighT anywAyz....me recoverinG welL~

and.....pakpAk and makmAk kepT askinG me not to eAt porK due to the reporTed swiNe flu heRe in the stAtez.....yeA, buT accordinG to CDC...it cAn't be spreAd viA food.... ;P


shAll sleeP moRe...
illZ...

mezZed pAncakez - duH...

me boughT pAncake mixes and expensiVe mAple syruP exciTedly abouT 2 weekZ bAck....and finAlly tried mAking some on a nice sundAy morninG befoRe meetinG mY fAmily on webcAm.....

and theN i reAlized how tougH it iz to mAke pAncakez:


totAlly mezZed uP!!!!


duH.....shAll repenT on mY pAncake skillz...>.<

anywAyz here'Z a sAd and lovelY pAncake sonG:


"you weRe meAnt for me" bY jeweL...


goT my eggZ and mY mezZed pAncakez toO...
illZ...

dustificAtion of abAndoned dreAmz...

didn'T feeL welL todAy (actuAlly for the pAst weeK!)...stilL manAged to struggLe througH lectureZ...eveN gAve a presentAtion...and luckilY i wAz abLe to leAve lAb todAy bY ~345pM...

wheN i reAched hoMe, i snAcked on goldeN oreO dunKed in chocolAte milK...doritoZ...littLe debbie'Z - awesoMe righT?!

theN slepT bY 415pM...plAnned to wAke bY 6pM buT woKe @ 8pM insteAd...ah.......buT noW i feeL mucH betteR - sleepinG iz indeed a nAtural therApy~

anywAyz...beN remiNded me recentlY thAt one shouLd alwAyz pursue dreAmz tiL the eNd...i alwAyz kneW thAt persistenT iz a necessAry fActor for suRe..........and noW i aM motivAted to keeP workinG towArdz my beAutiful scieNtific dreAm!! ;)

and thiZ morninG...i listeNed to a sonG whiLe wAlking to schooL....:



"it'Z mY seA" bY sodAgreen...


i uzed to thinK it'Z a verY sloW sonG...uncAtchy...buT wheN i listeNed to it in detAil.....the subtlY emotionAl lyricZ toucHed me - trAnzlated:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

in theZe recenT dAyz...
everythinG blAnked ouT suddenlY...

in thiZ recenT period of tiMe..
hAve i beeN awAkened bY my teArz froM my deeP sleeP...?

too mAny surpriseZ...
thAt cAn neveR coeRce me to feeL regretfuL...

too mAny hArdshipz...
thAt mAke anyone feArful of foreseeinG the futuRe...

you knoW i don'T wisH to leAve...
you knoW hoW fruztrAted i aM...
if tiMe alwAyz pAsses bY so quicklY...
hoW cAn i relY on you..?

it'Z mY seA...
in sucH a sloW infectiouZ sunnY afternooN...

wheN the seA izn'T bLue anymoRe..
alL mY abAndoned dreAmz trAnzform into dusT...

you knoW i don'T wisH to leAve...
you knoW hoW fruztrAted i aM...
if tiMe alwAyz pAsses bY so quicklY...
hoW cAn i relY on you???

you knoW i don'T wisH to leAve...
you knoW hoW fruztrAted i aM...
if tiMe alwAyz pAsses bY so quicklY...
hoW cAn i relY on you?

whAt aM i to do wheN mY teArz begiN to floW uncontrollAbly???

it'Z mY seA...
the lonelilY quieT afternooN depArtz silentlY...

the seA iz noT bLue...
i turN arouNd...buT i cAnnot reverZe whAt i'Ve doNe...

i wisH to shouT at the toP of mY voice...
i wisH thAt i trulY do noT understAnd...
i onlY wisH to sinG...to feeL soMe wArmth...
in ouR heArtz...
to aVoid irreversibLe damAges...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

...are soMe dreAmz juZ meAnt to be duZtified..?


where'Z mY seA...?
illZ...


p.S.: foR todAy...i'M stilL listeninG to thiZ sonG.... ;)

re-reAlized thAt lookZ ain'T everythinG...

susAn boyLe - whAt more cAn i sAy? see and lizteN for yourseLf:



"i dreAmed a dreAm" bY susAn boyLe...


plZ be ashAmed of yourseLf if you thinK thAt a non-good-lookinG persoN cAnnot be a greAt singeR or performeR........on the 1sT looK, yeZ, susAn boyLe mAy not looK nice...buT she actuAlly lookZ ok....she'Z simplY humAn - juZ liKe you and me.

personAlly, i do cAre aloT for mY appeArance....az you cAn reAd hoW mucH i argH-ed abouT mY pimpleZ and acNe...and weighT..............

do theY all mAtter at alL???!!

noW i re-reAlized the meAning of "don'T judGe a booK bY it'Z coveR"....

lookZ ain'T everythinG - trulY!!!!

and accepT thiZ - lookZ are trAnzient....no one cAn mAintain a hot bodY foreveR....aGe iz gonnA tAke good lookZ awAy....foreveR!! thiZ iz the Buddhizm principLe of impermAnence...and thAt'z whY Buddhistz offeR flowerZ on altArz...cuZ wheN the petAlz witheR...it iz a clAssical remindeR thAt anythinG physicAlly presenT iz impermAnent - mAkez perfecT seNze.....

so, i shouLd loVe myseLf az hoW i am.....juZ the wAy i am - juZ me.....

i do loVe myseLf the wAy i aM (mY pimpleZ....whicH mAke me looK youthfuL siNce mozlY onlY youthZ hAve pimpleZ!)...physicAlly...mentAlly...the whoLe of me - mY seLf lovinG... <3

...you (whoeveR~) shouLd too!!! ;)

.....onlY wheN you loVe yourseLf...theN you hAve the cApacity to loVe anyoNe or anythinG elZe.... ;)

mAkez logicAl seNze? yeA!!!!


growinG strongeR mentAlly...
illZ...


p.S.1: i'M typinG thiZ afteR drinkinG liKe...~1+cm off the bottLe of mY lovelY v.s.o.P....and i'M perfectlY oK~ juZ smilinG~ good, thiZ meAnz my alcohoL tolerAnce hAz improVed! ^O^

p.S.2: mY mobiLe phone'Z reAlly crAnking uP....it switcheZ itseLf off in 2 secondZ frequentlY wheN i picK uP a cAll.....sigH...buT it'Z oK....usuAlly no one cAllz anywAyz......juZ don'T mizunderstAnd thAt i purpoZely hAng uP if you eveR cAll my stAtez liNe ok....

me looK beloW 20..?

hahAa.....todAy'z my 1sT dAy witH my 3rd rotAtion lAb - a neuro-oncologY lAb - finAlly! afteR thiZ one'Z doNe...i cAn finAlly settLe dowN in mY thesiS lAb and leAd a moRe stAble grAduate studenT life....of courZe witH mAny moRe chAllengez! ^O^

so i'M a neW appeArance in the lAb......and i didn'T expecT peopLe to actuAlly guezZ mY age soMehow......i dizcoveRed theY were wonderinG wheN a coupLe of theM finAlly asKed me hoW old i aM~

it begAn witH the postdoC mentorinG me...and az usuAl, i wouLd asK hiM to telL me hiZ guezZ....so he guezZed 21. theN the otheR lAdy postdoC wAlked pAst and kindA joiNed in the guessinG...and she thoughT i'M beloW 20....hahAaa....

the lAtter muZ hAve thoughT i'M soMe highschooL attAchment studenT....mAybe it'Z cuZ i "bouNce arouNd" (az kahsuaN sAid)...and alSo the pimpleZ on mY cheekZ mAke me looK younG for my aGe.........duH!

adAm cAlled me thiZ eArly morninG befoRe boArding hiZ flighT bAck to floridA and he thoughT thAt i shouLd cleAr uP mY acNe cuZ i don'T need it...duH?! i alSo knoW.....argH i muZ looK so horribLe noW lAh....onlY the closesT to a persoN dAre to telL the trutH and for me - adAm juZ toLd the trutH. and mY fAmily alSo commenTed on webcAm.....argH!!!! >.<

bAck to the postdocZ - so theY were liKe surpriZed afteR knowinG i'M 25 turninG 26! aH........feelZ so oLd. >.<

okAi....bAck to schoolworK......tAke-home exAm to submiT bY wed...and a presentAtion on wed!!!!

moRe fAye for noW:


"the oNe in mY dreAm" bY fAye (cAntoneze)...


argH...
illZ...


p.S.: me gonnA nAil dowN my dermAtologizt on mY follow-uP appointmenT....i do whAtever he sAid and mY acNe juZ keepZ worseninG.......shouLd i reverT to uzinG proActiv whicH workZ buT drieZ my skiN??!

chAnging my miNd - thAnkz sisteR hAzel~!!

sisteR hAzel: "heY heY....did you eveR thinK theRe mighT be anotheR wAy....to juZ feeL betteR, juZ feeL betteR...abouT todAy?"

me: hmM....no? buT theRe shouLd be...

sisteR hAzel: "if you'Ve hAd enougH of alL youR tryinG....juZ giVe uP the stAte of miNd you'Re in!"

me: yeA...argH~!!!

sisteR hAzel: "if you'Re tiRed of fightinG (lozinG) bAttlez witH youRself...juZ chAnge youR miNd~!!!!!"

me: yeA....juZ gottA chAnge my miNd~!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

the aboVe are excerptZ froM thiZ chirpY sonG bY sisteR hAzel, titLed "chAnge youR miNd":


"chAnge youR miNd" bY sisteR hAzel...


the 1sT tiMe i heArd thiZ sonG on rAdio wAz ~5 or ~6 yeArz ago...while i wAz on a buS bAck in singApore. i wAnted to knoW whAt sonG it wAz to the extenT i texT msGd the DJ for informAtion....and he repLied me!!! ^O^

and thinkinG bAck in the yeAr of 2000? liKe 9 yeArz bAck....durinG thiZ civicZ lessoN heLd by mY civicZ tutoR in junioR colleGe...i remembeR i rebutTed mY civicZ tutoR, Mr. Kwan Chong Sin, thAt one shouLd neveR chAnge one'Z miNd to suiT the environmenT buT shouLd chAnge the environmenT to suiT oneseLf.....he kepT tellinG me thAt the formeR iz the righT thinG to do.....

righT noW, i analyZe it logicAlly...and the righT answeR shouLd be - one shouLd be flexibLe in one'Z miNd.....wheN it'Z too logicAl to chAnge, theN persisT! if one cAn't chAnge anythinG at alL anywAyz...theN accepT life and chAnge one'Z miNd...chAnge one'Z perzpectiVe! it all dependZ on the situAtion one iz iN...

foR me, i'Ve reAlized thiZ principLe of life...and i'Ve leArnt to chAnge my miNd for the mucH mucH mucH betteR~~~

and bAck to soMe chineZe sAying..."做人何必太执着?" = "whY shouLd a humAn be so stubborN?" whicH mAkez so mucH seNze...juZ chAnge youR miNd and you'lL be lotZ closeR to an impossibLe feelinG cAlled..........totAlly hAppy~

oH...and yezterdAy befoRe adAm lefT foR pennsylvAnia we meT shortlY afteR my clAzz to sAy goodbYe, and he toLd me to focuZ on mY studieZ and speNd moRe tiMe on mY studieZ...hahAaa...yeA whiLe he enjoyZ hiZ wonderfuL muzicAl and dAting life in sunnY floridA....and of courZe i wilL~!!! i'M reAlly gonnA puT in moRe efforT in botH mY lAb and courZe worK~!!!! thAt'z whAt i'M heRe in the stATez foR~ i feeL so mucH moRe motivAted~!!!!! ^O^

i bliVe i'M slowlY leArning to be a betteR humAn beinG~ ^.^ ^o^ ^O^


smileZ~
illZ~

Henessy V.S.O.P.

whAt i tyPed lAst night whiLe drinkinG in mY rooM:

"oh my God.....the v.s.o.P. iz simplY heAvenly~! it mAkez me lAugh so mucH eveN wheN typinG thiZ entrY........."

theN i kindA couldn't contiNue typinG and juZ sAved the entrY...LOL.....





i remembeR lAughing myseLf to sleeP lAst nighT...hahAaa....^O^

and i'M gonnA scouT for thiZ kiNd of tuliP shAped glAzz to properlY enjoY mY heAvenly deliciouZ aperiTif drinK:





and no worrieZ...i don'T drinK aloT eAch tiMe...righT noW the meniscuZ in mY bottLe iz righT beloW the "V.S.O.P." ovAl stickeR on the bottLe (see the aboVe imAge)~

me slepT so mucH betteR and i hAve no hAngover effecT siNce i cAn wAke uP @ 830am feelinG greAt~

and i drinK in mY rooM - the sAfezt plAce yeA? ;P

alL for a littLe fuN~


kudoZ to v.s.o.P.~!!!!
illZ...


p.S.: v.s.o.P. = verY superioR oLd pAle

openlY lovelY 16 apriL 2009~

todAy'z a speciAl and memorAble dAy....cuZ i'M blogginG afteR so mAny dAyz?

hmM....and i re-reAlized the true meAning of whAt makmAk alwAyz tellZ me....whicH iz "az a humAn, you hAve to be abLe to see thingZ openlY" - direcT trAnzlation of "做人要看得开"...whicH meAnz whAtever hAppenz or whAtever....i hAve to be abLe to accepT whAtever comeZ my wAy~ verY logicAl righT? ^.^

and also "拿得起就要放得下" = "whAtever you chooZe to picK uP...you hAve to be abLe to puT it dowN"...whicH meAnz whAtever you chooZe to be involVed in....you muZ be abLe to leT go of it......eveN moRe logicAl righT?? ^o^

i mizZ pakpAk and makmAk.....sometimeZ me and pakpAk wouLd go to takA (my mum'Z workplAce) and wAit arouNd for makmAk to end her worK...theN we'lL grAb snAckz (sometimeZ ice-creAm on breAd!) and tAke the trAin bAck home togetheR.........i wondeR wheN i wilL be abLe to do thAt agAin....i plAn to returN shortlY durinG chineZe neW yeAr period nexT yeAr... ^O^

oh! and adAm dropPed by juZ now afteR so lonG...and sAmely i cooKed dinneR foR hiM...and az i knoW...i cooK witH intuitioN....glAd whAt i cooK iz usuAlly quiTe ok~ ;)

and i'M glAd he got a fulL scholArship for soMe grAduate muzic progrAm thingie whicH i hAve no ideA whAt thAt'z abouT....todAy i asKed hiM agAin, and he sAid he also doezn'T knoW? duH......it'Z beeN lonG siNce we'Ve meT and chAtted and i guezZ chAncez liKe thAt are juZ gettinG rArer...

friendshiP doeZ fAde....i suppoZe...? everythinG fAdez....everythinG endZ... >.<

noW i prAy hArd for my immunologY midterM and the pdM exAm to be fiNe.............. *prAy*

and i'M so so so glAd todAy hAng-ni-mAh boughT on my behAlf a huGe bottLe of V.S.O.P. foR me~!!!!!!!! got hiM froM hiM afteR lectuRe todAy....no worrieZ, it'z purelY for fuN, and i won'T toxicAte myseLf endlezzlY....

not feelinG thAt welL recentlY so i won'T indulGe in mY lovelY V.S.O.P. anytiMe sooN....?

foR noW, i'M repeAting thiZ lovelY sonG:


"loVe" bY beyoNd...


lovelilY...
illZ...


p.S.1: i wAnna uploAd thiZ pictuRe of a dyinG cherrY blossoM petAl i tooK in wAshington dc...buT blogspoT seemZ to refuZe uploAding tonighT. nexT tiMe perhApz...

p.S.2: i reAlized i'M onlY 56.7kG noW!! argH....no wondeR adAm toLd me i looKed aloT skinnieR todAy......shAll try to balAnce bAck to my ideAl 58kG...

the one witH stronG armZ...

"coMe to me mY dArling chiLd...iz the worLd upsettinG you..?
i'lL hoLd you in my armZ a whiLe...
nothinG so bAd...
don'T you knoW thAt i wilL protecT you protecT you..?"
-the 1sT wordZ of "mY armZ are stronG"...

briAn speNce (the singeR and creAtor of the above sonG) generouzlY allowZ anyoNe to downloAd it here...

i fiNd the lyricZ lovinglY encourAging - someoNe eternAlly promizinG wArm sturdY armZ for anotheR to docK in any tiMe of negAtivity....... *awwW...*

and actuAlly, i kneW thiZ sonG froM a youtubeR, who sAng it abouT a keY loweR (i thinK?) but he sAng it witH feelingZ yoZ....:


epiphAnized'z performAnce of "mY armZ are stronG"...

right noW, i'M so exhAuzted...i compleTed the immunologY midterM exAm abouT 2 hourZ bAck...and alL i cAn sAy iz i trulY hoPe i did fiNe *fingerZ crozZed*...i trulY shouLd put more time and efforT in studyinG...spAce out differenT lectureZ....and i definitelY look forwArd to puT in my besT for the immunologY finAlz!!!! *motivAted!!*

mozlY...i juZ wannA get my miNd off everythinG elZe and burY myseLf in the lAb........

ah....whAt'z lefT for thiZ weeK are.....an actiVe pAper discussioN on thurZ...a pAper presentAtion on fridAy, a pdM cAncer quiZ due thiZ fridAy....a pdM cAncer finAl exAm on fridAy~!!!

noW i knoW whY my acNe'z worseninG....argH. mY heAd hurtZ and i need to sleeP... >.<

the triP to DC thiZ sAturday to enjoY the cherrY bloomZ shouLd be greAt...hoPe the cherrY flowerZ wilL stilL be pinkisH and heAlthy til theN...renatA confidentlY sAid theY wilL be~


who wilL cArry me hoMe...foreveR and eveR?
illZ...