yezterdAy, after completinG the "mArketing plAn" sectioN for my group'z BizPlan....i felT so relieVed...hahAaaa...
time checK --> ~5pm.
weather checK --> coolinG, after the rAin...
so i decided to visiT bedoK jettY for fuN!!
i thinK it wAz 7+pm wheN i reAched...thiZ iz the overvieW of the jettY froM the pArt neArer to the shoRe...lonG tiMe since i cLouded...heH, thiZ iz an eveninG cLoud...soMehow there wAz thiZ brighT pAtch in the skY...aboVe the shipZ....
so i wAlked to the eNd of the jettY and sAt there.
i juZ feel nice wheN i'M so neAr to the seA...it'z liKe reAching out into the unknowN....enjoyinG the fAint soundz of the wAvez (whicH i terM az the voice of the seA)...
luckilY there were not mAny people around...if not i won'T feeL liKe stAying around the jettY.
theN i begAn to chAt with the seA...of courZe i didn't sAy thingZ out (people wouLd lAbel me directly az mAd!!)....it'Z juZ a mentAl self-entertAining chAt.....welL, i guezZ the seA and me would requesT for some confidentiAlity...all i cAn sAy iz the seA replied viA soundZ of wAvez and breeZe...
hahAaa...i'M sucH a professionAl self-entertAiner...
i tooK thiZ one froM where i sAt....it'z a lookbAck @ the neArly emptY jettY....thiZ one giveZ me a full feelinG of lonelinezZ...but pure enjoyAble refuge froM the noisY citY you cAn see in the shorY bAckground...
durinG my stAy...i noticed lotzA shiPz pArked on the seA....but i focuzed on the reflectionZ of the ship lightZ on the dArk seA surfAce...everY reflectioN formZ a trAil thAt leAdz towardZ the jettY...whicH iz towArdz me! and everY trAil iz fuzzY and flickerinG cuZ the seA surfAce iz constAntly ripplinG......
thiZ iz life, cuZ no one cAn ever stAy @ a single steAdy stAte...botH physicAlly and mentAlly. we keeP chAnging....cApriciouz iz the appropriate word here....eveN if the entiRe seA iz frozeN, the chilly misT juZ above the ice surfAce will fuzzifY light reflectioNz too....
theN i tried to thinK about life of the shipperZ on the shipZ i looKed @...would they be lookinG @ me too? don'T they mizz the shoRe.....? ...there are livez on the seA...so i diverted and tried to imAgine the livez undeR the seA....the countlezZ seA creAturez that mAy be right undeR me cuZ i'M on the jettY.......
gosH, i reAlized i wAz surrouNded by life!!
i felT weird...juZ whAt did i feeL?
feAr? but i'M not runninG awAy...not reAlly scAred.
sAdnezz? but why shouLd i...?
hAppinezz? doesn'T feeL like it...
surpriZe? mAybe...
it'Z a mixed feelinG...i don'T knoW whAt i felT @ thAt time...aH, i knoW! it'Z the "i-suddenlY-feeL-so-smAll" kindA feelinG...
all of a suddeN i felT like i'M a specK of dusT in the biG big worLd...unbelievAbly yet believAbly smAll...tinY! i'm A lilliputiAn!!
theN i begAn to outreAch my miNd to livez all arouNd me...stretchinG out througH the gloBe....and yeZ, in thiZ cAze....i'M a true lilliputiAn...... perhApz microscopic...nAnoscopic.......eveN an electroN microscoPe mAy not detecT me...
whAt'z every life doinG???? are we livinG our liveZ correctlY? or incorrectlY? whAt hAz hAppened?? and whAt'z gonnA hAppen?
no one knoWz...i bliVe the seA knowZ......but she won'T tell me...
the seA dilvulgeZ thAt soMethingz are meAnt to remAin unknowN.
to the seA: thAnkz...you alwAyz giVe me the cAlm and sAfe feelinG...leAding me to a peAceful stAte of mind....chAt-ya agAin...mY lovelY seA.
livinG on...
illZ...