nitezzZ...

cAn't reAlly trAnzlate thiZ sonG titLe directlY...hahAaa....but i guezZ it shouLd suffice.

theZe feW dAyz, me beeN reAching hoMe verY lAte and settLed dowN onlY afteR midnighT......and thiZ sonG bY mAvis simplY dezcribeZ sAd citY dwellerZ returninG verY lAte at nighT..........i especiAlly loVe itZ lyricZ.



"returninG hoMe onlY wheN nighT fAllz..." - mAvis Hee.


"it'Z feelinG coLd...bcuZ it'Z pAst 12aM.
sAd memorieZ flAsh liKe wishinG stArz acrozZ my heArt...
it'Z a lonelY worLd withiN the dArk lAte nighT...
i'M purrinG in my bluR reverIe...

youR loVe hAz blurRified...
youR sAdnezz iz juZ az viVid...
thuZ heRe we aRe roAming the citY undeR the night skY..
wAndering arouNd - losT and scAred.
we'Ve chozeN to be forgotteN underneAth the moonlighT...

plZ forgeT alL of youR lovelY promiseS..
everyoNe loveZ withouT a singLe biT of confideNce..
plZ don'T wondeR where'Z youR sweeT dreAm...
you'Re alwAyz fRee to feeL lonelY alonG the roAd of lonelinezZ...

plZ forgeT alL of youR sweeT dreAmz...
hoW lonG wilL wArm sunrAyz shiNe on you afteR you wAke up?
juZ liKe a lAte night losT souL tryinG to find itZ directioN...
ignorinG the fAct thAt any roAd of loVe iz alwAyz too shorT.."


kudoZ to mAvis.


nitezzZ...
illZ...

appArently...

mAvis Hee - an experT singAporean singeR in melAncholic loVe songZ.

i thinK....she becAme mentAlly derAnged afteR beinG obessezZed witH the one she loveZ...and stilL loveZ? not suRe abouT thiZ poP rumouR buT thAt'z whAt i thinK it iz....bcuZ loVe iz so powerfuL it cAn mAddify someoNe.

i thinK the lessoN leArnt froM heR songZ is to be abLe to leT go - i hoPe she cAn and alreAdy hAz.

interestinglY...i heArd thiZ sonG befoRe...but i hAven't reAlly reAd itZ lyricZ:



"apparentlY..." bY mAvis.


"i thinK let'Z forgeT it...
let'Z simplY breAk up.
my heArt hurtZ...
mY loVe for you iz toO stronG..
are you leAving me witH the promiseS you mAde?
i hAve no moRe righT to requesT anythinG froM you...

i onlY wAnt you to knoW..
depArting from me iz unidirectionAl.
siNce the decisioN hAz beeN mAde...
whY shouLd i insisT thAt you stAy?
you've choseN to leAve me...
leAving me speechlezZ...
loVe puzzleZ you and me...

appArently, i knoW lovinG you wilL not leAd to a hAppy endinG...
buT whY am i so stubborN?
i gAve my alL for you...
buT you leAve me withouT any concerN..

appArently, i knoW lovinG you iz continuinG to be wronG...
buT whY iz my miNd so weAk?
i'M uzed to hAving you...
you juZ keeP lingerinG in my miNd...

perhApz i cAn preteNd thiZ to be a dreAm..?
and the wiNd wilL dizperZe thiZ dreAm wheN i wAke uP...."


off to dreAmland...hopefullY.
illZ...

a burzT of eMo...

eveR feeL liKe cryinG buT youR teArz juZ refuZe to obeY you?

theN thiZ iz the sonG for you:



an ultrA emotionAl sonG bY A*mei


i thinK....onlY creAmy cAn tolerAte me singinG thiZ @ kboX...hahAaa....
illZ...

crAisky hAppinezz? impossiblY perisHed.

i wAz deporTed froM dreAmland surprizinglY eArly todAy....thuZ heRe i aM trAnzlating 2 sAd songZ abouT hAppinezz...sAng by 2 of the besT voiceS of asiA:



"i wAnt hAppinezz" bY A*mei...i remembeR heAring xie yI sinG thiZ in lAb befoRe...


"i'M not borN to loVe lonelinezZ....buT i'M the loneliezT humAn...
eveN if i'M giveN the whoLe worLd...i stilL owN nothinG!

i wannA be hAppy...i wannA sleeP peAcefully...
soMe peopLe...fiNd wArmth onlY wheN the hugginG stopZ and stopZ hAting onlY wheN depArted..
i shouLd hAve relinquisHed my loVe verY lonG ago...

i wannA be hAppy...i wannA lAugh out az loud az i cAn...
my heArt hAz gone coLd...everythinG iz a phonY!!
onlY my teArz are genuiNe..."



"relinquishinG - everythinG" bY fAye wonG...


"i'M relinquishinG my every singLe thinG to the oneZ i loVe....
willinG to owN nothinG...
and enjoY hAving no attAchmentz at alL...

if sAdnezz stilL hAuntz me...
leT the wiNd disperZe it...

if i eveR stilL hAve hAppinezz..?
if i eveR stilL hAve hAppinezz.
mAybe, or noT."



i losT mY pAzzport to dreAmland...
illZ...


p.S.: todAy shouLd be a hAppy dAy siNce my lAb meetinG presentAtion wenT welL....i receiVed a coupLe of frAnk prAises froM a feW lAbberz~ ^o^

p.p.S.: crAisky = crAzy + highlY riskY = a terM i coiNed foR lAb meetinG~

p.p.p.S.: "there wilL alwAyz be a possibLe withiN impossibLe" - a phrAze i coiNed foR lAb meetinG~

swinginG silveR zombieZ in my miNd...

beeN hAving a constAnt funnY reddisH slighT flusH on my fAce....to the extenT joN (grAce's boyfrieNd) asKed me if i drAnk alcohoL wheN he sAw me lAst tueZ? looKed at the mirroR and i do looK slightlY reddisH...

anywAyz, heArd "zoMbie" by crAnberriez on pAndora in the lAb todAy:



awesoMe sonG abouT the troubleZ in irelAnd in 1960z.


the lyricZ are verY stronG...sAng in an addictiVe tuNe witH a surreAl voice...the wordZ are abouT fightinG and unpeAce - a wAr? it seemZ to be insultinG thoZe who uze violeNce to silenT the opponenT aZ "zoMbiez"...in a derogAtory mAnner.

are you ofteN trApped in bAttlez withiN youR owN miNd? conflictinG thoughtZ...fightinG confuzinG ideAz and contrAdicting rebuttAlz......un-understAndable and illogicAl @ timeZ but unavoidAble................but sinfullY fuN?!

welL, @ leAzt i do..?

losT - thuZ i quick-shoT myseLf witH pAtron silveR in a zestY magArita mix...



(froM googLe imAge)


suddenlY recAlled how i loVed to plAy witH the swinG neAr my schooL afteR clAsses whiLe wAiting for my pakpAk to fetcH me......wheN i wAz ~10? hAven't beeN swinginG for a forgotteN period of tiMe...and i mizZ pakpAk. <3


zombieZ are all arouNd... >.<
illZ...

fireflieZ witH brokeN heArtz...

tizzY inviTed me for retAil therApy witH dArshil, arviN...and a neW nice bloNde i kneW todAy - liZ~!! lookZ liKe grAd studentZ froM the pAthobiology and phArmacology progrAmz are trulY merginG ouR outingZ.....hmM...;)

we pAzzed by thiZ pAtch of grAzzland neAr hoMewood cAmpuz where we stopPed sunshiNe (tizzy'Z goldeN toyotA avAlon~)...and tizzY sAid there weRe fireflieZ alL oveR:



if you looK cAreful enougH...you cAn see one "flyinG fiRe"~


retAil therApy iteM of the dAy: a cuTe americAn eAglez shirT witH minI collArz! ;P

an oLd sonG occupied my miNd thiZ coupLe of dAyz....the meAning of itZ lyricZ sAddened me..:



"a brokeN heArt" bY kiT chAn... (so mAny bAlloonz~)


trAnzlated excerptZ:

"uncontrollAbly...i crY az i smiLe...i stilL mizZ beinG protecTed in youR armZ.....i refuZe to be loVed by you simplY bcuZ i cAnnot fAce your wellnezZ..."

"no mAtter how we quArrel and fighT...we botH cAn neveR forgeT ouR loVe...if i simplY wAtch you wAlk awAy froM me....mY heArt wilL be brokeN alL mY life..."



a firefly'Z heArt wilL breAk wheN itZ fiRe iz extinguisHed...
illZ...


p.S.: the drAgon fiRe wilL be stronG foreveR~!!

midnighT rendezvouZ...

heRe i aM, in mY owN worLd......in isolAtion.

heAring the fAint boominG souNd of fireworkZ (it'Z 4tH of julY) in the bAckground.....whAt'z witH fireworkZ anywAy? it'Z seriouZ aiR pollutioN....

...and repeAting thiZ sonG bY fAye:



"rendezvouZ" bY fAye...i usuAlly repeAt thiZ sonG on 13tH februAry.


trAnzlated excerptZ:

"the fingerprintZ you lefT on me...the secretZ i oWe you......wilL all be returNed to the angelZ tonighT..."

"hAppinezz ariseZ bY chAnce....whY shouLd teArz be resistAnt..? we wAlked througH the sAme streeT....buT we returN to two differenT worldZ...."

"forgivinG you....and youR rinG fingeR.....you leT me bliVe thAt there'Z true loVe. aH....missinG you exhAustz me...i cAn onlY envY the oNe witH youthfuL innoceNce..."


trulY tempTed to drinK aloT theZe feW nightZ.......buT i feNded off thAt thoughT bcuZ my humorouZ dermAtologizt asKed me to cuT dowN on mY alcohoL intAke....so i shAll obeY.

"...juZ one or two beerZ iz enougH.." wAz whAt dR. joN sAid......and i alreAdy hAd 3 beerZ @ ben'Z pArty eArlier on...

oK, mAybe i'lL juZ tAke a quicK pAtron silveR shoT. ;P


..?
illZ...


p.S.: i thinK....in futuRe, i shouLd avoid gettinG cloZe to alL chriztiAnz and cAtholicz bcuZ of mY owN personAl dizagreementZ witH whAt theY blindlY bliVe in. howeveR, whY cAn't my miNd be more tolerAble?? i need to groW uP and mAture my miNd in thiZ azpecT, and juZ keeP my sillY moutH shuT on thiZ toPic and supprezZ my meAn thoughtZ and commentZ - esp. wheN adAm cAllz...

p.p.S.: "you behAve liKe a bAby"....duH?

kobAyashi-ing on independeNce dAy~!!!

youtuBe'z 4tH of julY bAnner~!!!!


it'Z 4tH julY 2009 - U.S.A.'z Independence Day.

somethinG like singApore'z 9tH of augusT National Day??? yeA.....i'M not a pAtriotic persoN i suppoZe...eveN wheN i'M bAck in singApore, i'M not thAT exciTed about nAtional dAy.....

"i mizZ my fAmily more thAn my countrY itseLf..." wAz my replY to pAul (wheN he asKed me if i mizZ singApore) - a nice guY i meT @ ben'Z annuAl 4tH of julY pArty @ hiZ minI mAnsion...locAted at a streeT so neW it'Z not eveN on the gpS~~~

anywAyz, durinG the pArty.....i reAlized that everY 4tH of julY, there'Z thiZ sAdiztic hoT doG eAting contesT.......but interestinG to wAtch??? ;P

heRe it iz:



noTe thAt pArticipation iz by invitAtion onlY~!!


consuminG 60+ hoT dogZ in 10 minZ iz simplY crAzy..........wondeR hoW mucH yAkult muZ be drAnk to aid digestioN.....?

so, the competitioN seemZ to be onlY betweeN joeY chestnuT and thiZ jApaneze guY - tAkeru kobayAshi~

joeY lookz juZ like any otheR typicAl whiTe americAn.....

buT i reAlly like tAkeru'z hAirstyle thiZ yeAr!! woW.....i seArched arouNd and noticed thAt he chAngez hAirstyle and coloR liKe frequentlY....i trulY admiRe hoW fAshionable jApaneze are~!!! if i studY in japAn i wondeR hoW my imAge wouLd be.....nicelY coloRed hAir and whAtever~~~ ^o^



hAppy bdAy uniTed stAtez of americA~!!
illZ~


p.S.: onliNe shoppinG iz the eAziest wAy to speNd moneY......i clicKed arouNd and spenT abouT 150 USD....buT welL spenT on keeN shoeZ i trulY need! mY previouZ keeN iz weAring off.....thAnkz for the feeT comforT it gAve me for the pAst 2 or 3 yeArz~

p.p.S.: sopHie (beN and rAchel'Z 4-yR-oLd dAughter) iz soooooO adorAble~!!!!!!!! she'Z the kiNd of chiLd thAt wilL mAke you wannA hAve your owN chiLd... <3

20.00~!!!

eArlier on todAy, me wenT to superfresH to buY more deliciouZ junK food...

grAbbed 3 huGe pAcketz of doritoZ.. ;P

surprizinglY, the totAl amounT wAz exActly 20.00 buckZ~!!!!



see my receipT~!!


the cAshier wAz surpriZed too and asKed if i purpozely cAlculated to mAke my totAl sucH a nice figuRe...welL of courZe not~~~

recAlling the awesoMe addisoN burgeR meAl @ kooperZ witH grAce yezterdAy...tonight'Z dinneR iz much junkieR and simpleR - a slice of breAd + hotdoG + lettuce + cheeZe, doritoZ, some mAngo orAnge juice, and 2 mAdeleine cookieZ, and a minI strAwberry shortcAke rolL.

somehoW i'M lozinG weighT grAdually bAzed on sucH junkie dieT....


20.00~!!!
illZ...


p.S.: wouLd hAve rusHed to buY 4D for "2000" if i wAz in singApore...